First Trimester

November fifth is when we got the call from the doctor saying that we were pregnant, which is one day after the anniversary of my husband proposing to me!  I think that's kinda cool.  The only bummer is that my first trimester happened to fall on three of the major holidays - Thanksgiving, Christmas, and my birthday.  


My birthday falls near Thanksgiving every year and this particular year it happened to fall on Wednesday - one of the largest party days of the year.  My wonderful husband asked all of our friends to help celebrate my first anniversary of my thirtieth birthday at one of our favorite local spots, The Office.  We had about three big waves of friends that showed up throughout the evening all wanting to buy me a drink.  I tried to pawn off most offers saying that I was getting up early to prepare Thanksgiving dinner, which wasn't an answer that most people wanted to hear.  To help matters I asked the bartender to make me a virgin drink that looked de-virginized.  So basically I was drinking juice in a martini glass.  It was great to see all our friends, but man was I tired. 


Most of you multiple moms, and even singleton moms, may hate me.  My first trimester was relatively easy.  When I found out I was pregnant I didn't show any symptoms.  A few weeks into it, the girls were sore but my worst symptom in my first trimester was that I was just exhausted.  I really had two bedtimes.  The first bedtime was 6pm where I would fall asleep on the couch.  My second bedtime was at 9pm, when I would awaken from the couch and take myself upstairs to actually go to bed.  I never had any morning sickness and really was never nauseous.  I just had to make sure that I ate when I was hungry, which has never been an issue for me!  


Thanksgiving is now held at my house every year which I typically really enjoy.  But no one knowing your pregnant and fighting through the exhaustion was no fun.  Plus people knew we were trying so I felt like I was under a magnify glass.  My oldest sister was asking why I wasn't having wine with dinner.  I used the excuse that my husband's parents didn't believe in drinking so I didn't want to offend them.  My middle sister was the most persistent one always asking me "How should I pray for you?".  What she was really asking in code was "So are you pregnant yet?".  Even my brother-in-law questioned why I was so tired at the end of the day.  I was so happy when Friday arrived.  Most people were out shopping and I think I slept most that day to make up for my past two busy days.

My sisters are 11 and 8.5 years older than me, and I consider both of them very dear friends.  When my oldest sister became pregnant with my niece, I was 13 years old, my mother bought her a crib and told my middle sister and I that she would buy us a crib when we had a baby.  I always remembered that and looked forward to the day of crib shopping with my mom.  

The day after our ultrasound, which was the beginning of December, that we found out we were having triplets, I was meeting my mom out for a quick Christmas shopping trip and one of our weekly lunches.  She was one of the only people that knew that I was even pregnant and I wanted to tell her about our new discovery.  So I casually brought up the idea of her buying us a crib.  She casually responded "Of course I will do that.  I did with your sister and I will with you too".  I then asked "Well, does that mean you are going to buy us three cribs?".  She immediately stopped in her tracks and looked at me with her eyes as big as green saucers.  "What!?" I think was all she could muster.  When it finally sunk in that she may be the grandmother of triplets, I thought she was going to bust at the seams.  Every store we went in, she told someone.  Now I was still being very cautious because of what had happened before, but her joy and enthusiasm gave me such comfort that day.  It was so much fun being excited instead of scared or nervous.  I told her during lunch that I apparently needed to be more specific in what I prayed for.  I started praying for twins because I didn't want to go through the fertility process again.  After we had the miscarriage I yelled at God saying that he took one away and now he owed me one.  I feel like He gave me my twins and the one that I was "owed".  God certainly has a sense of humor, but now I'm VERY specific in my prayers!  

It wasn't until Christmas that I told my sisters and the rest of the family.  By this time I was coming close to being twelve weeks and close to the end of my first trimester.  I was starting to feel a little more comfortable since every doctors appointment has gone exceptionally well.  I took one of my ultrasound photos that showed all three sacks and put it in a mug that said "World's Greatest Aunt" and wrapped it up and secretly put them under the tree saying it was from Santa.   It was the last gifts to be opened and my sisters angrily looked at me when my niece handed them a gift and I didn't get one.  We had agreed to only buy for the kids and not for each other to save a few dollars.  They opened it at the same time and my oldest sister immediately shrieked and tears started to trickle down her face.  My middle sister sat there not knowing what was going on or what she was looking at.  When I made the announcement that we were having three babies, the whole family erupted!  My sister's mother-in-law has become a real part in our family and she took one of the photos and placed it in her bible.  She prayed for me and our babies everyday.  She has now become an honorary grandmother - who wouldn't want three grandma's growing up? 

A few days after Christmas my oldest sister, niece, mom and I went maternity shopping.  I wasn't even in my second trimester and my jeans were being held shut by a hair-tie instead of the button.  It was another one of those fun days.  Everyone's joy and excitement helped me forget about all the nerves.  It seemed weird trying on maternity clothes and we were also trying to figure out what size moo-moos to buy.  Who knew how big my stomach would get?!  I will tell you one thing, maternity clothes are SO comfortable, but I swear that ninety percent of maternity tops have horizontal stripes.  WHY?!  Is this the time of our lives that we are supposed to look as large as possible?  I really didn't think I needed help with that! 

New Years came and went.  Friends were starting to wonder about me since I was home sleeping New Years Eve at 10pm and I was showing a small baby bump already.  We finally started telling everyone, and I'm sure you can imagine the reactions.  I think the most common one was "Holy Crap!  Are you serious?!".  

We continued seeing our fertility doctor every three weeks through the first trimester.  The one cool thing about having multiples is that we had an ultrasound at every visit.  It was so amazing watching them grow, listening to all their heart beats and watching them move around.  They were all movers and shakers and the doctor was always amazed at how much they were dancing around.  At my last appointment, I felt like I had graduated.  They sent me off with three silver baby spoons and a whole bunch of pamphlets and magazines and waved goodbye.  This was one doctor I hoped to never see again.  

Hello

We will start with the first and most obvious truth - life is busy!  My triplets were born 7-7-11 and I am just now, ten months later, going to try to find moments to write about what life is like being a triplet mom.  I thought this may be interesting to write since the most common comments people say when I'm out with the peanuts are "I can't imagine what life is like with three!" or "I don't know how you do it".


Another odd thing that people ask is "Were you surprised when you found out you were having triplets?".  I can't imagine anyone in this world not being surprised!  I assume most people are like me... you dream about getting married and having children one at a time like "normal" people and don't even think about having a litter of babies.  


Before I was a mom, I worked as an interior designer as well as a sales representative in the design world.  I really enjoyed my job and for recreation my husband and I would play volleyball a few times a week and would travel a few times a year.  We lived life like this for the first 4 years that we were married and then decided it was time to start a family.  Again, we thought we would be "normal" and be able to have children the old fashioned way.  You are programed from the time you're young that when a man and a woman love each other very much, they get married and together, in love, have a baby.  Well...unfortunately it doesn't necessarily work that way.  They don't tell you when you're young that there is a chance that this love they speak of turns into living life around your menstrual cycle and a doctor with a turkey baster.  Not quite as romantic sounding.  In fact, fertility treatment is just down right stressful.  


I figured I would talk about this because other big questions that are asked by random people are "We're you on fertility?" or the more discrete people will ask "Do multiples run in your family?".  I don't know if it's a pregnancy thing or a multiples thing, but for some reason people think that this gives them a right to ask personal questions about your uterus.  So let's talk about it... 


Yes, I was on fertility because my uterine lining was not thick enough for an egg to implant.  After a year of trying and no luck I went to the doctor and got a very painful uterine biopsy done basically for her to tell me what I already knew.  I was sent to a fertility specialist and they ran blood work and another painful procedure to make sure my tubes were not blocked.  When everything came back "normal", they started me on Clomid with a side of IUI.  First of all, Clomid is an AWEFUL drug!  I was so dizzy and light-headed and basically, according to my husband, became catatonic.  I couldn't think straight if I wanted to and felt absolutely miserable.  IUI is a procedure that my husband would drop off his "love juice", coined by my good friend, in the morning and in the afternoon I would arrive and the doctor would use a special baster to ensure all the good sperm is up where it needs to be to meet an egg.  The procedure isn't really painful and it's very fast, but I can't say that it fun by any means.  After that becomes the awful part of waiting for two weeks to see if it worked.  Being aware of every pinch, pain, cramp and waiting to pee on a stick hoping for a positive result.  It's not a way to live.  


After three months of that with no luck of pregnancy and the doctor still not happy with my lining, she wanted to start me on injections.  Seriously!?  She informed us that we had about a 2% chance of getting pregnant on our own and a 5% chance on the Clomid.  A "normal" person has a 20% chance of getting pregnant every month.  That's depressing.  I have to go through all this stuff to be "normal"?  I was scared to death to give myself a shot everyday, which goes into your stomach.  Plus, how I would feel on a medication that is considered stronger than Clomid?  Another downer to this medication is that you can't do anything more strenuous than walking.  This medication makes the ovaries so large and heavy that they could twist on themselves and if this happens they need to be removed.  As I said before, my husband and I had played volleyball a few times a week and we were very active people.  I was beside myself.  At this point it was May and I decided to take a break to enjoy the summer.  It felt so good to feel normal and healthy again, but at the same time I felt this uncontrollable guilt that I wasn't doing everything I needed to do to get pregnant.  


August came and I decided it was time just to suck it up and try the injections.  I remember being at home staring at this contraption they gave me that measures out the medication and all I had to do was switch out the needles.  I called my girlfriend because I needed a cheerleader to talk me into my first shot.  I look back and laugh now.  Here I am with my shirt pulled up and my stomach exposed, on the phone, with my other hand shaking with a tiny needle about an inch away from my skin.  My girlfriend decided that she was going to do it with me and got a safety pin and said we were going to do it together.  She started the count down and I was pacing, laughing, and yelling "I can't do it".  She got to one and I closed my eyes and jabbed myself.  It was nearly painless!  My friend, on the other hand, yelped at her prick of the safety pin.  What are good friends for, right?!  I was pleasantly surprised at the lack of side effects from this medication.  Yes, not being able to play or work out was a bummer, but I will take that any day over Clomid!  The first month everything went well and everything looked like it should.  I went in for my basting and waited two weeks.  Eagerly, I peed on a stick because "the girls" were sore along with other normal pregnancy symptoms.  Nothin.  I didn't believe it and called the doctor for a blood draw.  The next day they confirmed I was pregnant!  We told EVERYONE!  So exciting!


Six weeks in the pregnancy I was sitting on the couch and suddenly started to get major cramping and started to spot.  I called the doctor immediately and they said this could be normal.  I didn't believe them and I went in.  It was too early to see anything on the ultrasound so they drew more blood.  I miscarried that night and they called to confirm what I already knew in the morning.  I wouldn't wish this on anyone!  I have never felt so devastated and angry.  Not only do you have to mourn the loss of that child, but now you have to un-tell everyone you told and relive that pain every time it's brought up.  We had to be off a month of fertility to allow my body to heal before we could start treatment again.  I don't think I could have jumped into another round after that anyway.  I had the help of my family, friends, and pastor to get me through the pain.  But even now, I wonder about that child and I look forward to meeting him or her in heaven one day. 


October rolled around and we start another round of fertility.  I was on the same amount of medication that I was before and my body reacted like it was crack.  I was producing 6 follicles (eggs).  The doctor lowered my medication so that only a few would mature.  At the point of the basting, I had three perfect eggs and once again I waited those excruciating two weeks.  I called the doctor and said that I was sick of peeing on a stick and just wanted to come in for a blood test.  I honestly didn't think I was pregnant since I wasn't feeling any symptoms like I did during my first pregnancy, but I went in anyway because I didn't want any false information.  I was called the next day, November 5th, with the excitement that we were pregnant and my hormone levels were already better than they were before!  We didn't tell anyone, except my mom, until I was able to go in for my first ultrasound.  My husband and I both went for the ultrasound and I think we were both holding our breaths that everything looked ok.  I remember laying there in the darkened room and the doctor came in and started.  I couldn't see the screen yet, and then she started counting.  "There is one....there's two...."  Holy crap she's still counting!  "There's three".  PLEASE STOP COUNTING!  She stopped after three.  Thank God!  I looked at my husband and he was standing up leaning against the wall with no expression.  Not even blinking.  I looked at the doctor and she started to show me everything.  There is the first sack and a peanut looking thing was in it.  Same with the second sack.  Third sack was visible, but we couldn't see a peanut.  She told me that she thought we would be having twins because she was not seeing anything developing in the third sack, but we would know more on our next ultrasound in three weeks.  The drive home was a blur.  I remember just being full of excitement and my husband was still staring.  I told him I wanted to keep them all.  I didn't want to loose another baby.  


Three weeks later we went back.  Not only was the third sack still there but a peanut was developing and was the biggest one of all three! The doctor told us not to declare from the mountains that we were having triplets because we were now entering the door that was marked "high risk pregnancy".